Every parent has days during the raising of their child that feel like the worst. Days your child is sick, you are sick, teething madness, days your little one decided to be wide awake before the sun, etc. These days seem never ending, and parents are thankful that their child will more than likely not remember them.
Having a 6 month old is filled with excitement, smiles, and various bodily fluids. Hell is a happy baby. She smiles a lot and giggles randomly whenever we are just hanging out. Yeah, she has her moments when she is cranky, and I can find nothing wrong; however, overall she is a happy little drooling machine.
The worst days for me is when Hell is at her most adorable, and I feel at my worst. A lot of moms have days where they feel abandoned, hopeless, or just plain lonely. Hell’s smiles try to warm my heart, but during these times, they just add a layer of guilt to the mix. I ponder why I can’t just be happy that I have this cute little Hellion?
Of course, there are no answers.
Trying to overcome these moments, I wear a fake smile, and give Hell extra hugs and kisses. I am thankful that she is too young to see through a fake smile. The burden should not be on her to make me happy. Deep in these moments, I logically know I am happy, but feelings claw up from a pit in me and nag at me. Afterward, they feel fictional, almost silly, until I feel their claws another day.
Luckily, these moments don’t happen frequently, and when they do, I can mostly fool the world around me by pretending to be the textbook mother they believe I am.
Any other parents have these days? If so, how do you deal?